Recently, my friend Ace posted this picture on Facebook that asked “Are you woman enough to love a broken man?” I read the post and almost cried instantly. I don’t know why but that post weighed VERY HEAVY on my heart!!!
I know some of Ace’s story, I know how hurt and broken down he has been over the last 7 years. I have heard the pain in his voice when he tells his story. I have read the social media posts, and can read behind the words, my friend is hurt! He and I have a similar story, being that we both experienced domestic violence, and were both on the receiving end. Yes, I know we don’t hear about men that were victims of DV often, yet it happens.
Overall though, my friend Ace IS a BROKEN MAN!!
It truly hurts me to know how hurt he is, when ultimately he just wants a God fearing woman on his team that will support him, uplift him, encourage him, spend quality time with him, and allow him to lead her closer to Christ. I guess that is not too much to ask, but as a woman, loving a broken man can be tough. We can see the potential that he has, and we know where he has been, and we want to fix him. Or even worst, we want him to put a band aide on the brokenness and be Superman for us.
ATTENTION LADIES, these methods WILL NOT WORK!!!
Loving a broken man will require lots and lots of prayer. Only God can fix the hurt that he has endured. Only God can mend him into the man that he is called to be. Being a prayer warrior for Mr. Right will not only encourage him to get better, but will also allow him to know that you are on his team and in it for the long run. Praying with and for him lets him know that, though you may not understand his hurt, you identify with it because it is a part of him. Think about it, his brokenness is a part of him that you ultimately fell in love with.
Colossians 4:2 (NLT) tells us “Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart”. Being alert while praying allows us to hear God when he speaks to us regarding our prayer. He is able to speak to us clearly because we are in an intimate place with him and we want his glory revealed. Consequently, we are at an intimate place in Christ and thankful for the amazing things that we know God can and will do. Going into prayer with a thankful heart is telling God that you appreciate the moves he is making on your behalf prior to him even moving. We already know that Christ can do exceedingly and abundantly above all we can ask or think (Ephesians 3:20), so praying with a thankful heart confirms that we know the power of prayer. The broken man that you are praying for NEEDS your covering just as he needs his own. He needs a prayer warrior that knows that he is in a broken state, but wants the Lord to move on his behalf according to God’s will. Your broken man is not dependent on your prayers, but he is relieved to know that you love him for where he is and you are trusting God to take him to greater heights through Him.
Let us all remember, broken crayons still color, however we have to be more careful being that the crayon is in a broken state. We have to be careful as it relates to a broken man as well. Though he has many amazing qualities, there are areas in his life that he is working on and rebuilding to be a better him. As you two continue to work together and grow as a couple, remember that you have to grow even more in Christ. Ephesians 4:2-3 (Contemporary English Version) says “Always be humble and gentle. Patiently put up with each other and love each other. Try your best to lets God’s Spirit keep your hearts united. Do this by living in peace.” As a woman, being humble, gentle, patient, and having genuine love will take you further than you would ever know. Men crave a woman that will be an encourager, a woman that will lift him when he is down, someone that will be genuine at heart in every aspect of her life and his. As you grow together and grow in Christ, Ephesians 4:2-3 should resonate in your hearts and unity through the Holy Spirit should be your ultimate goal.
Loving a broken man is not the easiest thing in the world, but it’s not that bad! We serve and awesome God that will give you the strength to uplift even when you don’t feel like it. We serve a God that will give you peace in the midst of a storm, and the words to encourage when you feel he just needs to ‘man up’. My friend Ace, the broken man that prompted this post, will be fine. He has a divine calling on his life that is allowing God to move like he has never moved before. Though he has struggled with relationships over the last several years, I know that God has an AMAZING God Fearing woman that will complete him like never before. She will love him for who he is, she will be patient when he is having a trying time. This woman will embrace everything that he has to offer and spend the quality time that he requires. She will be his teammate, he will be the point guard and she the shooting guard. They will have each others back in the midst of any storm, and work together to rebuild after the rain. Ultimately, she will be everything that he has dreamed of!! And I praise the Lord in advance for blessing this man, a man that holds a very special place in my heart, for giving him all of his hearts desires.
If you are a single woman, and God sends a broken man your way, know that God is using you to minister to him in ways he will never know. Be you, be genuine, and accept him for who he is! If you are currently dating a broken man, know that God is using you as a vessel. He is allowing you to be a blessing to a man that needs everything that you bring to the table. Ladies, continue to fear God and lean to him. He has the answers to your prayers, answers that you could never dream of (Jeremiah 33:3). Though times may get tough, but remember ALL THINGS work together for your good, because you love Him and trust His will (Romans 8:28)!!!
Fellas, if you are a broken man, and you have an AMAZING woman on your team, let her know that you appreciate her for the woman that she is. She may not understand why you feel the way that you do, being that you were broken during a prior relationship, but if she loves the Lord, He will provide her with all she needs to support you. Not every woman that you meet will be a woman that God wants in your life. Be prayerful that He will lead you to the woman that has all the qualities that will encourage you to become a better man. ALSO, just because you are a broken man doesn’t mean that you are defeated. God has a great plan for you and your life, he wants to see you prosper and live an amazing live through Him (Jeremiah 29:11). Don’t get discouraged, everything that you have been through has molded you into the man that God wants you to be. And he is moving on your behalf, RIGHT NOW (Isaiah 64:4)!
Broken Men and Beautiful Women trust God! He is preparing you for an amazing life in Him.
My Prayer: Lord we thank you! We thank you for the broken men and the women that love them. We thank you for all of the trials and tribulations that any broken man has faced for we know that you are working on his behalf right now. Father we pray for healing of any broken man, woman, or child that needs you and needs your love. I pray that you will consume them and love on them like never before. Father I pray that you will provide a mountain of protection around any broken person and that you will allow them to see you like never before. Father, heal them. Love them. Restore them. Give them the tools to become better in you. Give them friends and family that will pray with and for them. Lord, for that broken man out there that doesn’t see hope in relationships, I pray you will send someone that will show him the love of Christ Jesus. Father we thank you now for being so amazing! We thank you now for your love, your word, your grace, and your new mercies that you bestow on us EVERY MORNING. Lord we thank you. Father we know that you can and will do exceedingly and abundantly above all we could ask or think and we just thank you for moving so mightily. Father we love you, we thank you, and we praise you. In Jesus MIGHTY, MATCHLESS, and MAJESTIC name we pray.
Amen and Praise God!!!
If you, or someone you know, is a victim of Domestic Violence, call the National Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) OR TTY 1-800-787-3224